Introduction
In the book, The Road Less Travelled, writer Scott Peck mentions the concept of entropy; a force that we have to overcome to move forward.
I believe entropy amplifies once we cross 30, not because it is a biological and natural response to growing older, but because of life circumstances and conditioning.
When we turn 30, we measure where we stand in life. Most of the time, it feels like we failed, based on long-held beliefs and what we see around us.
At 35, it is even worse. If we have not achieved what we thought we should, entropy is there to tell us it is too late. We are too old, too set in our ways, too chained by commitments and so on. And those are not excuses, they are totally legitimate reasons.
I can assure you back pain is real once you get older but the goal is not to climb Mount Everest anyway (if it is, Salud! You got this).
Here are a few ways I tackled my own entropy using certain mindset reframes.:
The Growth Mindset
Some of you might have heard of the ‘fixed mindset’ and ‘growth mindset’ models put forward by Carol Dweck.
Somebody with a fixed mindset believes that intelligence, abilities, and talents are not changeable. They cannot be improved with effort.
The growth mindset teaches us that they can be.
Because our 20s is a period of many changes and life evolutions, i.e. a period of growth, we enter our thirties hoping for some greater stability in our lives. But that stability usually devolves into a fixed mindset.
‘I wish I did that when I was younger’, you say. Well, the growth mindset is for life and it tells us, just like Obama’s campaign would: YES WE CAN.
Embracing the beginner’s mindset
In our thirties, some of us achieve senior positions in our professions. This means greater responsibilities, more accountability, an established image and command of greater respect.
While those are accolades to be celebrated, they should not keep us stuck in embodying a persona that is attached to a single status and apprehensive of new beginnings.
It is ok to say: I do not know but I am willing to learn, irrespective of your job title or previous positions held.
When we switch into lifelong learning mode, we can only add to the established image.
We do not start from scratch, we start from experience. We can induce and transfer all those lessons from the trials and tribulations endured by our younger selves.
Photo by Hello I’m Nik on Unsplash
Change the mountain mindset
So many of us are going nowhere fast.
I was going nowhere at warp speed. On the outside, it looked great and definitely looked like I was heading in the right direction…..to others.
There is an apathy that developed internally, a lack of motivation, and a dampening of excitement in tackling challenges that used to make us feel alive.
At some point in time, we were motivated intrinsically by goals that kept us on track. Those goals were important to us, e.g. getting to a certain level in life. It does not matter what goal it is as long as it matters to us.
But once we reach that level, the tendency is to think more in terms of what others expect of us or look up to standards that are not ours.
We hold on to what we achieve because we are scared of losing it and what used to drive us to move further up is gone. What if that mountain has been conquered?
Letting go is not going downhill but moving to the foot of a different mountain.
Instead of looking down, ask yourself where do I want to go from here? What can I gain from this new position that can benefit others too?
Reframe the goal post and watch the motivation come back.
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Entropy is real, I have felt it and experienced it. It is a lifelong combat but it does not need to be a never-ending fight against our own nature as goal-seeking beings.
It just requires periodical recalibration and a willingness to work on mindsets that no longer serve us.
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This post was previously published on medium.com.
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Photo credit: Cristofer Maximilian on Unsplash
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